'No, of course not.' She hears the edge in her voice and closes her eyes. He doesn't deserve the brunt of her anger.

'It does let me understand what happened. It wasn't random. It was very specific, and as bizarre as it sounds, it made a certain kind of sense. It doesn't change what happened. It doesn't mean I forgive him for what he did, to my mother, to himself, to me.'

'But it answers so many questions, Gene. It's like -- there's been this invisible force, this dark current running through my life. I could either let it drag me under, or I could find a way to -- work with it. It defines me, yes, but it doesn't rule me.'